When I heard the words "you have cancer" I was scared. When I heard the words "you need chemotherapy" I was REALLY scared. For some reason chemo scared me even more than the cancer. I guess in my mind I had assumed that because I had been so pro-active and had mammograms from the time I was 30 that there would be no way I would ever need chemo. They would just cut the darn thing out and be done with it. Things are not always as they seem.
I had already seen my mom go through chemo for breast cancer and just the idea of it is so crazy - poison racing through your body. How could anyone want to do such a thing. Things have changed so much. It is still poison killing cancer cells (go poison) and it definitely sucks dealing with the side effects but they are not nearly what they were. The fact is - this chemo most likely is allowing me to see my children get married, see my grandchildren born, and grow relatively old with my husband. I would go through hell and back to be able to do that. I am not done with this world - too many things I need to give back.
I know many people choose not to go through chemo - some of them are fine - and some are not. I needed better odds than that. Now that I am in the thick of my last round I can honestly say I would do it all over again if it meant one more day of being alive.
I think someday soon chemo will be a thing of the past -like VCRs and 8-track tapes. Even if we don't find a cure right away - the way we treat cancer is changing - getting better. Every day that we are closer to finding a cure is a good day.
3 comments:
I'm glad you feel that way, and I'm glad you made the decision you made. I hope you're feeling good today and your family is enjoying the last visit of the chemo monster. :-)
You continue to amaze me with your grace and strength. I 100% agree with you and I would have made the same decsion. I would do anything for one more day, hour or second with my family! So glad you are feeling well and thrilled that chemo is now behind you! Happy Mother's Day Kristin and thank you for a being an inspiration to me!
Keep it up! Living is always better than the alternative and if it is chemo that keeps you alive, then make the best of it.
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